A Vision For You

”Now and then a serious drinker, being dry at the moment says, “I don’t miss it at all. Feel better. Work better. Having a better time.” As ex-problem drinkers, we smile at such a sally. We know our friend is like a boy whistling in the dark to keep up his spirits. He fools himself. Inwardly he would give anything to take half a dozen drinks and get away with them. He will presently try the old game again, for he isn’t happy about his sobriety. He cannot picture life without alcohol. Some day he will be unable to imagine life either with alcohol or without it.Then he will know loneliness such as few do. He will be at the jumping –off place. He will wish for the end.”-pg. 152 from the chapter “a Vision For You” from the Big Book of Alcohol Anonymous

 

Most of us can relate to the idea of white knuckling it when it comes to our sobriety and receiving detox. Some of us need to “act as if” or “fake it until we make it” in order to stay sober in the beginning or even at times when we are dry. Through the help of AboveItAll, AA, or other forms addiction recovery we acquire the tools we need to stay sober long term. It’s okay that we are like the boy whistling in the dark as long as we stay sober through it and are able to turn things over and do the work. After all it is the hard times that show us we can stay sober through anything as long as we remain willing and dedicated to this way of living.

Step Twelve from the AA Twelve and Twelve

“Of course all A.A.'s, even the best, fall far short of such achievements as a consistent thing. Without necessarily taking that first drink, we often get quite far off the beam. Our troubles sometimes begin with indifference. We are sober and happy in our A.A. work. Things go well at home and office. We naturally congratulate ourselves on what later proves to be a far too easy and superficial point of view. We temporarily cease to grow because we feel satisfied that there is no need for all of A.A.'s Twelve Steps for us. We are doing fine on a few of them. Maybe we are doing fine on only two of them, the First Step and that part of the Twelfth where we "carry the message." In A.A. slang, that blissful state is known as "two-stepping." And it can go on for years. The best-intention-ed of us can fall for the "two-step" illusion. Sooner or later the pink cloud stage wears off and things go disappointingly dull. We begin to think that A.A. doesn't pay off after all. We become puzzled and discouraged.  Then perhaps life, as it has a way of doing, suddenly hands us a great big lump that we can't begin to swallow, let alone digest. We fail to get a worked-for promotion. We lose that good job. Maybe there are serious domestic or romantic difficulties, or perhaps that boy we thought God was looking after becomes a military casualty.”- From the chapter on Step Twelve from the AA Twelve and Twelve

When we first receive drug rehab through going to Above It All Treatment , AA, or other 12 step programs many of us have the desperation needed to do the work in order to stay sober. As time goes by many of us begin to feel better and get lives. We start to rest on our laurels sometimes without even being aware of it. While many of us can skate by for a little bit on service work the fact is that it usually catches up to us and at some point we end up feeling like our world is crashing down around us, and we end up robbing ourselves of the gifts that come from having emotional sobriety. It is up to us to realize we get out what we put in and to remain diligent in our recovery process.

Step 3 In Sobriety

“Maybe this all sounds mysterious and remote, something like Einstein's theory of relativity or a proposition in nuclear physics. It isn't at all. Let's look at how practical it actually is. Every man and woman who has joined A.A. and intends to stick has, without realizing it, made a beginning on Step Three. Isn't it true that in all matters touching upon alcohol, each of them has decided to turn his or her life over to the care, protection, and guidance of Alcoholics Anonymous? Already willingness has been achieved to cast out one's own will and one's own ideas about the alcohol problem in favor of those suggested by A.A. Any willing newcomer feels sure A.A. is the only safe harbor for the foundering vessel he has become. Now if this is not turning one's will and life over to a newfound Providence, then what is it? But suppose that instinct still cries out, as it certainly will, "Yes, respecting alcohol, I guess I have to be dependent upon A.A., but in all other matters I must still maintain my independence. Nothing is going to turn me into a nonentity. If I keep on turning my life and my will over to the care of something or somebody else, what will become of me? I'll look like the hole in the doughnut." This, of course, is the process by which instinct and logic always seek to bolster egotism, and so frustrate spiritual development. The trouble is that this kind of thinking takes no real account of the facts.”-from the chapter on Step Three from The AA Twelve and Twelve

Many of us as alcoholics feel like we have already made a big enough sacrifice when we get to the point of going into a detox, AA, or Above It All Treatment Center. Alcohol was our solution to everything and here we were faced with having to give it up as well as turn our will and life over to a power greater than ourselves. How were we supposed to do that? Through doing the work, getting rehabilitation, and realizing that we suffered not just from a phenomenon of craving but also from a spiritual malady we were able to start building a foundation for our sobriety. Through cleaning house, trusting God, and working with others we were able to see our lives change for the better. The more that we continue this practice the more free we get to be.